A few days ago, I went out and got some Chinese food. First, and most importantly, it was fucking fantastic! Second, and even more most important, my fortune cookies started to chat me up.
They didn't even start off subtle, either.
Others are deeply moved by your presence... in bed.
I could only respond to that in one way: fuckin' right they are!
But it didn't stop there. My leftovers also included a fortune cookie.
You express yourself with charm and humor... in bed.
Oh, Fortune Cookies, you say such things-- I'm blushing. If only you were animate...
I'm having the last of the Chinese food tonight, before it goes bad and starts a refrigerator revolt. I'm hoping my fortune cookies will affirm their love for me, but secretly fear they may leave me for the moo shoo crepes.